It didn’t dawn on me that there might be a few holes in my education until I was about thirty-five. I’d just bought a house, the pipes needed fixing, and the plumber was standing in my kitchen. There he was—a short, beefy guy with a goatee and a Red Sox cap and a thick Boston accent—and I suddenly learned that I didn’t have the slightest idea what to say to someone like him. So alien was his experience to me, so unguessable his values, so mysterious his very language, that I couldn’t succeed in engaging him in a few minutes of small talk before he got down to work. Fourteen years of higher education and a handful of Ivy League degrees, and there I was, stiff and stupid, struck dumb by my own dumbness. “Ivy retardation,” a friend of mine calls this. I could carry on conversations with people from other countries, in other languages, but I couldn’t talk to the man who was standing in my own house.
It’s not surprising that it took me so long to discover the extent of my miseducation, because the last thing an elite education will teach you is its own inadequacy. As two dozen years at Yale and Columbia have shown me, elite colleges relentlessly encourage their students to flatter themselves for being there, and for what being there can do for them. The advantages of an elite education are indeed undeniable. You learn to think, at least in certain ways, and you make the contacts needed to launch yourself into a life rich in all of society’s most cherished rewards. To consider that while some opportunities are being created, others are being canceled and that while some abilities are being developed, others are being crippled, is, within this context, not only outrageous, but inconceivable.
The first disadvantage of an elite education, as I learned in my kitchen that day, is that it makes you incapable of talking to people who aren’t like you. Elite schools pride themselves on their diversity, but that diversity is almost entirely a matter of ethnicity and race. With respect to class, these schools are largely—indeed increasingly—homogeneous. Visit any elite campus in our great nation and you can thrill to the heartwarming spectacle of the children of white businesspeople and professionals studying and playing alongside the children of black, Asian, and Latino businesspeople and professionals. At the same time, because these schools tend to cultivate liberal attitudes, they leave their students in the paradoxical position of wanting to advocate on behalf of the working class while being unable to hold a simple conversation with anyone in it. Witness the last two Democratic presidential nominees, Al Gore and John Kerry: one each from Harvard and Yale, both earnest, decent, intelligent men, both utterly incapable of communicating with the larger electorate.
But it isn’t just a matter of class. My education taught me to believe that people who didn’t go to an Ivy League or equivalent school weren’t worth talking to, regardless of their class. I was given the unmistakable message that such people were beneath me. We were “the best and the brightest,” as these places love to say, and everyone else was, well, something else: less good, less bright. I learned to give that little nod of understanding, that slightly sympathetic “oh,” when people told me they went to a less prestigious college. (If I’d gone to Harvard, I would have learned to say “in Boston” when I was asked where I went to school—the Cambridge version of noblesse oblige.) I never learned that there are smart people who don’t go to elite colleges, often precisely for reasons of class. I never learned that there are smart people who don’t go to college at all. Elite institutions are supposed to provide a humanistic education, but the first principle of humanism is Terence’s: “Nothing human is alien to me.” The first disadvantage of an elite education is how very much of the human it alienates you from.
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This article is nicely composed but utterly obnoxious. Congratulations to the author for finally learning what came naturally to many of us, Ivy educated and not: how to be a sensitive human being.
Posted by Jay Katz on Wed 9 Dec 2009
As someone who is currently not in an Ivy league school but at a school that sells shirts claiming "The Harvard of the Midwest" (which I have not purchased), I can still appreciate and echo the disdain of this article. I received the best scholarship the school had to offer and immediately was vaulted into this kind of elite club that told the promising students how much better they are than all the other ones. Even at my small, public, liberal arts school, some members of this "elite" club are pretentious jerks who don't see life outside of the cells in their biology textbooks. If the "best and the brightest" grow up to be the leaders and innovators of our country, but have never walked in the worn shoes of the everyman, we will be steered down a twisted, self-serving, self-praising road as opposed to one for the good of all.
Posted by Megan on Thu 4 Nov 2010
This is the most patently obnoxious article I've read in a long time. The guy seems to be saying he is so absurdly intelligent and superhuman, he can't possibly relate to the little people who came to fix his plumbing. What a plate-glass ass.
Posted by Stephen on Thu 30 Dec 2010
This is epicly.. the best thing I have ever read.. ever.. like in all my years.. like ever..
Posted by Gao on Fri 7 Jan 2011